Ladubba Zaman Ma’aurata

0
994

RAYUWA AKAN MANUFA

Rayuwa ba manufa, rayuwa ce marar dandano. Matukar ma’aurata sun hadu akan manufa daya zasu rayu ne akan wannan manufar, amma in akayi rashin dace yadda miji yake kallon al’amura da banbanci da nahiyar da ita take kallo, toh! anan tushen sabani yake.

In dai manufa kuwa zata banbanta hanyoyin isa ga manufar ma zasu banbanta. A wannan yanayi sabani da cin karo zai dabaibaye zamantakewar aure, saboda ba akan manufa daya ake tafiya ba.

Duk kammalallen mutum ya na samun nasara ne saboda dabi’ar tsayuwa akan manufa. A cikin manufar samar da dan adam zamu iya fahimtar gamammiyar manufar aure.

Hajiya amarya manufarku ta farko ta kasance zaman ibada da neman yardar Allah ba al’ada ba.

Akwai kebantacciyar manufar aure nau’ika biyu; Asliyyah; Kiyaye wanzuwar jinsin dan adam. Sai kuma Taba’iyya sauran manufofi da mutum ya kudura a ransa a matsayin manufar da ta motsa shi ya yi aure;haihuwa, kamewa daga sha’awa,biyan bukatar dabi’a, godewa ni’imar Allah da sauransu.

Ma’auratan da suka gina zamantakewar aurensu akan manufa ingantacciya sun fi kusa da jin tsoron Allah wajen kulawa da hakkokin junansu, kuma aure yafi albarka.

SOYAYYA, AMANA DA KULAWA

Soyayya, amana da kulawa sune manyan sirrukan dorewar zamantakewar ma’aurata cikin aminci da amintarwa. AlKur’ani mai girma ya bamu wasu ka’idodi guda uku assakan, al-mawadda, ar-rahma domin samun ingantacciyar zamantakewar aure mai haifar da kyakkyawar makoma.

Yaren soyayya guda biyar su ne; kyauta, bada lokaci (kulawa), hidimtawa juna, yabawa juna da kuma haduwar gangan jiki.

Ummul Mu’uminina Radiyallahu anha ta na bayanin yadda fiyayyen halitta salawaatu Rabbiy wa salaamuhu alaihi yake rayuwar soyayya da iyalansa, hatta fita sallah in zai yi ya kan sunbace su domin rayar da ruhin kauna.

Tsarkakakkiyar soyayya mai asali ta na kunshe da kulawa ta musamman, binciken zamani ya tabbatar da cewa kulawa ta musamman da fahimtar juna su ne mafi girman abin da yake gaggawar mallake zuciyar abokin zama. Akwai mabanbantan hanyoyi na nunawa juna soyayya a zamanance

KYAKKYAWAR MU’AMALA

Ma’aurata zasu mu’amalanci junansu da mafi kyawun mu’amala “Wa aashiruuhunna bil Ma’aruf “, “Wa lahunna misthlul Laziy alaihinna bil Ma’aruf” su taimakawa junansu wajen biyayya ga Allah jalla wa alaa da Manzonsa.

Akwai fuskoki masu yawa da zasu bamu misalai na yadda shugabanmu abin koyinmu sallallahu alaihi wa sallam yake kyakkyawar mu’amala ta koli da iyalansa, ya basu yalwataccen lokaci, ya nuna musu kauna da soyayya, su yi raha, wanka, hira duk tare, ya taya su aikin gida, ya na musu gyara cikin sauki, hikima da azanci ya kuma nuna kishinsa gare su.

Hajiya amarya ki faranta masa ta kowacce fuska, ki girmamashi, ki gabatar da bukatunsa akan kowa*, ki girmama ra’ayi da karbar shawararsa a muhallin da ya dace, ki kasance mai nutsuwa da bin komai a tsanaki, tuna masa tsare-tsarensa na rayuwa, ki nemo dubarun kwantar da hankalin his excellency yayin fushi, bacin rai ko wata musiba.

Masu hikima sun tattare sirrin samun sa’adar zamantakewar aure a Khamsah Taa’aat da ya kamata a samu zaman tare; at-Tafaahum, at-Tasaamuh, at-Tafaa’ul, at-Tazayyun, at-Tajaddud

TAUSAYI, RAHMA, SAUKI DA SAUKAKAWA

Wadannan dunkulallun halaye jigo ne mai karfi da yake rike zaman tare, wanda ake bukatarsa ga dukkan bangarorin biyu, domin wannan jigo ya na biyo bayan tsaftatacciyar kauna da take zukatan ma’aurata. Annabin rahma sallallahu alaihi wa sallam yayi gamammiyar wasiyya akan a rike mata da alkhairi cikin kyautatawa a kowanne yanayi na mu’amala da su, kuma a aikace za muga gaba fayan rayuwarsa ta na fassara ludufi da bin zamantakewarsa da su sannu-sannu.

“Istausuu bin nisaa’I khairan fa’innal mar’ata khuliqna min dwala’in a’awaj. Wa inna a’awaju ma fid dala’i a’alaahu”

Imam an-Nawawiy (Allah ya masa rahma) ya ce: “A cikin wannan akwai kira ga laddafawa mata da kyautata musu, hakuri akan karkatar dabi’arsu da hakurin juriya akan raunin hankulansu”

Shaykh AbdulAziz Ibnu Baaz (Allah ya masa rahma) ya na cewa: “Wannan umarni ne ga mazaje, iyaye, yan uwa da wasunsu akan su kyautata mu’amala ga jinsin mata, kada su zalunce su, su basu hakkokinsu, sannan su fuskantar dasu zuwa alkhairi”19

Ku sani sabani dabi’a ce ta dan adam, duk cikar mutum ya na kuskureduk kamalarsa ta ilimi, addini, wayewa ko fahimtar rayuwa ta mutum dan adamtaka ta na gitta masa. Idan yadda sabani ya gitta, al’amura sun rikice, ki gayyato nutsuwa zuciyarki  kar ki  zartar da hukunci yayin fushi, ki tuno 90/10 rules kada ki nemi saki, ba fita yaji, kar ki fasa yi masa da’a-domin daman don Allah kike-kada kuma ki kai kararsa wajen Iyaye, ki koma ga Allah, kiyi alwalla kiyi sallah raka’a biyu kiyi addu’o’i a ciki…Sannan daga baya kibi matakan da suka dace-Allah ya taimaka ya kuma rufa asiri-

RUFEWA

Kiyaye ladubban zamantakewar aure shi zai baiwa auren armashi da sakamako mafi inganci, wanda wannan sakamakon shi zai sanya al’umma ta zama akan saiti da ci gaba wanda akasin haka zai jefa al’umma cikin mummunar makoma-Allah jalla wa alaa ya kiyaye-Dr. Muhammad Sani Umar ya na cewa:“Masu miyagun tunani sun dago kai, suna aiki dare da rana domin ganin cewa sun rushe ginin wannan al’umma wanda farkon tubalinsa an gina shi ne daga gida.

Idan miji da mata suka sami hada kansu bisa turba ta musulunci to sai ka samu yayansu sun taso cikin kyakkyawar tarbiyya, To amma da zarar aka samu kishiyar haka, wato miji da mata suka gina rayuwa ba akan turba ba, to lamarin ‘ya’yansu ba zai yi kyau ba”.

Rabbana hab lana min azwaajina wa zurriyyatina qurrata a’ayunin waj’alna lil muttaqina imaama. Wa antal musta’aan wa alaikal balaagh wala haula wala quwwata illa billahil aliyyul azeem. Wa sallallahu wa sallam alaa nabiyyina Muhammad wa aalihi wa sahb ihi ajma’in.

Subhanakallahumma wa  bihamdika asshahadu an laa ilaha illa anta astaghfiruka wa atuubu ilaika.

karanta yadda zaki mayar da gidan ki masarautar ki  ko ladubban tarewa a gidan miji ko Mahimmancin Aure a rawuwa domin sauki cekakken littafin ladubban zamantakewar aure danna koren rubutu